My name is Billieann, I am here to talk about my experience with a toxic, narcissistic, woman abuser. I have learned and now trust my findings, that the more toxic the man the smoother he is. I was now three years divorced and working for a local Veterinarian. I was not looking for a relationship, nor was I going to reject, should a decent man come my way. As luck would have it, David walked through the door with his dogs for their check-up’s and my heart skipped a beat. I silently watched him with his pets and the respect he had shown to the staff and customers alike. I was smitten by this older gentleman. He was kind yet his presence demanded respect from the room. He seemed to be the best of both worlds. Mr. Kale and I began to chat about my tattoos and who I had do them (I would later learn that he started every conversation with strangers the exact same way, but his stories about them became more and more elaborate) 
I mentioned to the front desk girl that I thought he was very attractive and made a comment about getting his number for me if he was single. I Came back upfront with his name and number he had written for her to give me. I waited a few days as not to come across as a giddy High School girl. Then I did it, I sent the first text and we chatted for several weeks through text. I felt myself falling more and more for this man as we opened up about life. However it didn’t take long for the conversation to turn. He made a comment that I am unable to quote verbatim as years have past. The comment was something like.. you’ve never had a Dom and it shows. I asked what he was talking about and over the course of the next few weeks he taught me about THE BDSM lifestyle. My one and only marriage lasted for 26 years and I was unfamiliar with what he was teaching me. I admit, it intrigued me very much. I had my likes and dislikes of some of the things I had been taught and, being the open woman I am, I had no problem telling him what I would and wouldn’t be willing to allow. To speed this up, I am going to fast forward 3 months. He stayed at my place the day of a surgery and helped me in anyway he could. I had been going to his home and watching movies. He would make me dinners and made me feel very comfortable, warm, safe and secure. Obviously during those three months our relationship became intimate in a sexual nature. His ability to speak and make me feel safe enough to drop my inhibitions was astounding. Still to this day I am upset with myself for allowing someone to get in my head so much. But for me. This was real, this man captivated me. With the sweet words came yelling and being upset with me over anything and everything he would make me feel extreme guilt and then make himself unavailable in both person and phone. He was unreachable for a week or so. I would stay home and wallow in my guilt that I ran off a good man. Guess who would call or text and tell me he loves me? Yep, Mr. Kale, and all was right with the world. He would forgive me and life would begin again. Only this time, the yelling was more intense, the pretending to back hand me (I am a smart ass to the extreme) and he didn’t know how to deal with me. I grew up with an abusive father and over the years learned to make eye contact and never look away, never let him see the tears or the idea that he broke me. So I’d stand firm and at times I would laugh in his face, I really think he was bewildered at my actions and keeping my feet planted. Sex was amazing! His ability to talk me into new and exciting things only brought us closer. I would be blindfolded and my hands cuffed behind me standing totally naked in the center of his room. He was teaching me to relax and learn to enjoy anticipation. Anticipation of what I wondered. I learned over the course of our Off again, on again time together of two years. The anticipation could be anywhere from a sexual act of receiving and giving to a smack on the ass with a bare hand or object. The smacks became whippings with a belt. I do remember in detail, as I cried and cowered in the corner he placed me in. “Please David. Please do not hit me with a belt” (my father had also used a belt on me as a child) this action now set me off and was a huge trigger. He lowered my blind fold and my eyes began to sweep the room. I noticed 4 different leather belts lined up according to thickness. Again the begging began. He looked me directly in the eyes and for the first time I saw nothing as I looked back in his. His dark eyes became darker, cold and I started to think I wouldn’t make it out of here alive. The begging didn’t help. He covered my eyes up, turned me back around in the corner and whipped me with the first belt, then the second. I don’t know why, but he stopped and put the belts away and asked me, as if nothing happened if I wanted to watch a movie! What the fuck? I complied out of fear. I noticed I began blaming myself for everything that was negative about our relationship. But as with domestic violence, I just told myself to try harder. If I tried harder things would be different. Arms being pulled behind my back because I was 5 minutes late for a dinner and movie. He NEVER went in public with me. Ever! Yet again, I excused it by thinking, if I was thinner, prettier, sexy he would then take me out, right? At this point, I am now using makeup to cover the bruises left on my arms and neck. I used clothing to help hide the bruises on my breasts, thighs and back. I am broken yet I still refused to believe it. My mind knew but my heart kept telling me to stop overthinking. A pistol was held to my left temple on three different occasions. All in the name of teaching me about gun safety. David’s home has approximately 5-6 cameras all professionally installed on the outside of the home and transmitted to a smaller screen that is directly above his normal television. he is paranoid beyond belief. I chalked it up to his PTSD from his days in the military and past lifestyle. I am not telling my story in its entirety as some things are too personal and or painful. Scratching the surface is all I am capable of. To wrap this up, I now look back and thank God I walked out of that house alive. My daughter saved me. She had a very blunt conversation with me and told me I’m not the same person I was 2 years ago. I had changed and become withdrawn and reclusive to everyone but him. My daughter is my best friend and deep down I knew all of what she was telling me, but thought I was hiding. I pray for the females who have come before me and the ones who have yet to come. I pray for their physical bodies, I pray for their strength and I pray that their eyes will be open to the grooming and brainwashing before it’s too late. I fear he is becoming more aggressive with each relationship. If you know me, you know I always look for the silver lining and try to remain positive. HOWEVER David Kale, I hope for you to see the damage you have caused your victims and have to live with that. I hope the guilt begins to break you down.